Back for more, huh? Okay, you asked for it…
Welcome back to A-Zoo. A weekly segment where I impart my VAST knowledge of the animal kingdom to the social media generation through the power of GIF.
If we’re doing this alphabetically, I suppose I’d better move onto D. So today’s animal is the ‘dragonfly’.
Dragonflies are a close relation of your common house fly while sharing the same DNA as DRAGONS, that probably went extinct about the same time as the dinosaurs because of that big flood. (Noah said there wasn’t enough room on board for the dinosaurs but really they would’ve been total buzz-kills on his party yacht.)
Now, dragonflies physically resemble your normal fly – except they breathe fire. Which has it’s ups and downs. Like, if it landed on your cheese sandwich you wouldn’t want to eat it after a pesky fly had squatted on it. But dragonfly-fire could potentially turn it into a cheese toastie and thus kill off any pooh germs. And then it’s more than okay. Unless it totally burns your face off in the process.
The most famous dragonfly is the one St George beat up. The legend goes that George was having a lovely old picnic with an ordinary brie and bacon baguette, when he suddenly got the urge to have it toasted – because he was that kinda guy. So he let the dragonfly land on his lunchbox and breathe fire over it. The dragonfly burnt that baguette up a treat but George wasn’t happy; he’d only bought it from one of those baguette shops at the train station and they ain’t cheap! So George totally messed up that dragonfly. It had been a regular pest during Sunday church anyway but it was alright because everyone just forgave him and then made him a Saint because it had been getting on their nerves too.
Next week: this is going to be a shock, the Electric eel animated gif
by Jack Purling